2023-02-11 - Unfair Choices
| Title: Unfair Choices | |
|---|---|
| Summary: Mai, while out to clear her head, comes across Kyouka, who is also out clearing her head. Commiseration and angst ensues. | |
| Who: | |
| Where: Nishitama Park District (Tama Outer City) | |
| OOC - IC Date: 2/11/2023 - Wednesday, February 17, 2016 | |
.****************************** Tama Outer City *******************************.
*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+* Nishitama Park District +*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*+*
The largest, but least densely populated area of Tokyo, Nishitama is on the
westernmost border of the great metropolis, where city has become town,
which becomes forest, which finally becomes towering mountain. Consisting
mostly of woods and mountains, Nishitama is home to lush greenery, ample
wildlife, and fresh flowing water that has yet to be tainted by the city
below. Fishing and hiking are popular here, and in good weather,
city-dwellers who long to stretch their legs can camp out in the forest
without ever leaving Tokyo's borders.
The spiritually inclined can find a wealth of opportunity in Nishitama's
mountains. The nearby Mount Mitake has been regarded as sacred since time
beyond memory, and a Shinto shrine at its peak safeguards its considerable
power. Mount Mito was forbidden ground throughout the Sengoku era, a policy
which preserved some ancient beech trees on its hills. Finally, the
2000-meter Mount Kumotori is the tallest in the area, with a clear view of
distant Mount Fuji and much of the region from its summit.
All of this natural beauty is a mere hour and a half from Shinjuku Station
even at the extreme end of the district.
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed. <SoundTracker> Shining Days - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0BwkCtcxQhU
It's not too cold today, right?
Sometimes a girl just needs time to herself. The beauty of nature is on full display in Ohtori's myriad gardens and greenhouses, and it's in part for that reason that Mai is pointedly not exploring them again today. Instead, she's out for a walk on her own in what would be a beautifully shaded trail through the trees.
It's kind of winter so the branches are a touch barren, but it's still not a bad path.
She's jogging, lightly, though between the scarf and jacket she's not exactly at a full sprint. Just a little bit of pep in her step, as the headphones that cushion her ears from the cold play something upbeat and peppy to keep her spirits up. But at the same time, she's trying to be careful, because in her hand is a travel cup with the Dark Burger logo, and coffee is hot when spilled.
Mai doesn't have a problem.
She's just looking for a good...bench or rock or something to pause at. And in the meantime - she can just sing softly to herself because there's no one to hear her.
"To a glittering sea of stars, we mutter our important wish..."
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Kyouka is, by all accounts, a pretty tough and active girl--she takes to most sports with ease, she always pushes herself hard in both P.E. and track club, and her particular brand of fighting as a magical girl relies on her passion for martial arts--all those punches and kicks had to come from somewhere, after all.
But she has different sides to her, of course--she loves to cook, for one, but she also will turn into an absolute mother hen when sojmeone is injured or sick, fussing over them and doing everything she can to make sure that they get better as quickly as possible. And of course, for being so brezey and casual most of the time, she has her worries, too.
She's had an extra helping of worries lately, in fact.
So to try and clear her head a bit, she's come to the outdoors, to engage in something she doesn't show nearly as often. Up ahead of Mai, probably visible as she turns a bend or crests a hill, is Kyouka. She's dressed in sneaker and a black tracksuit, and has found purchase on a large, flat rock. She's striking a rather odd pose at first glance, but after a few moments, as she carefully shifts to a different pose with a slow, deliberate, and graceful motion, it might become clear: she is meditatively performing tai chi.
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed.
Jogging around the bend, Mai keeps singing to herself a little longer. She's still not keeping up a great pace, it's just - going, doing something, trying not to think about groceries or studying or roommates or the lyrics of the song she's echoing, she's just...just...
"-oh hey, a rock. That looks like a great diversion from any sort of introspection today," she mutters under her breath.
She pauses, seeing the rock is occupied. She pauses again, recognizing just who is occupying it. And so her pace slows to a walk, slows again to a stop as she carefully moves her headphones to hang on her neck, tinny music still playing from the slightly-battered speakers.
"...afternoon, Okazaki-chan. Any chance I could share your rock for a minute?"
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Kyouka may be a girl of action, always ready to charge into a fight or go head to head with someone in some friendly competition, but she has her quiet moments, too. It's just harder for her to share these things rather than a sport or a group activity. But for the moment, she appears mostly calm and collected, every movement slow, deliberate, and methodical.
They key word being 'mostly'. There's a little bit of a frown to her face, a bit of tension dragging on her movements. It's slight, but it's there.
She doesn't immediately respond to Mai, looking at whatever's off in the distance as she finishes the movement she was in the middle of, transitions into some kind of salute or finishing movement, and then stands upright. She takes a deep breath, and then turns to Mai with a muted smile. "Hey, Tohika-chan. Fancy running into you here."
She looks a bit more animated now as she nods, walking up to the edge of the rock and dropping down easily to sit on the edge of it, her legs danging off the side. "Sure thing," she says, gesturing to the rock. "What brings you out this way?"
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed.
Mai can be patient. It's been known to happen. It's honestly a useful skill, with some of what's in her life. So she can wait for Kyouka to finish her exercise, at least for a minute.
She reaches into her jacket pocket, fumbling at the device within to finally pause her music, then approaches the rock with a faint smile of her own. "Oh, the usual. Fresh air. Escaping studying. Getting a cup of terrible coffee and fleeing inevitable judgment."
Mai takes a sip from her cup, flinches, sits down - and takes another sip.
"...I like it bitter, some days. And I don't want to waste the actually good coffee Kuga bought, so - cheap and terrible enough for my tastes." She lifts the cup in a joking salute. "I do have some somewhat less terrible cookies if you need a snack break, though."
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Kyouka chuckles, "Well, you won't get any judgement from me... though..." She looks a tthe coffee cup. "Hmm. Didn't get to finish my last meal at the Dark Burger..." she comments to herself as she reaches down to her backpack, which is laying against the base of the rock.
"I came out for some fresh air and to... ponder some stuff." There's a hesitation as she says that, though she doesn't go into any further detail, just yet.
She chuckles, "I could go for some cookies. Trade you..." She pulls out a ziplock bag from her pack. "... homemade granola bars?" She opens the bag and sets it down between the two of them, then goes for the water bottle in her pack next.
"Oh, speaking of homemade, I made a bunch of chocolates for my friends for Valentine's day, and I saved some for you and Mikoto. I meant to try and get around on Valentine's Day for the people I didn't see at school, but..." She looks down a bit. "Something came up."
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed.
Mai raises an eyebrow at unfinished meals, but doesn't press for details. She has coffee, and just takes a long sip from it - it's hot, it's unsweetened, it pushes off whatever chill has encroached upon her today.
Stuff. Stuff to ponder, and Mai just quips one word in response. "Mood."
She rummages in her pocket a moment, produces a little plastic bag of cookies, and literally tosses it underhand. "Sounds like a good deal. I wanted to get at least one batch right, so I...might have a few misbakes or broken cookies to share. At least they're good snacks." She does reach for a granola bar, though, because that sounds pretty good...
...but Kyouka's last comment gives her pause, and she hesitates. Lets the silence hang a moment, while Mai bites her lip, weighing the situation...and ultimately just setting down her coffee cup on the rock next to her. "...things come up. Is it...anything you want to talk about? Because if you want distraction, I've got a playlist of peppy songs with a track record of keeping your mind off things."
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Kyouka's last and only meal at the Dark Burger was interrupted by the untimely arrival of Shadow Stern. She could probably go back and try a burger there again, but... last time the draw was meeting new people, not the food.
She catches the bag of cookies and sets them down with the granola bars, in case either of them feel like mixing and matching from both bags. She does take a few cookies to savor them. "Mmm... still pretty good. And hey, I get it. I don't make chocolate a lot, so the first couple of batches were... not the ones I shared."
The asking of what came up as her contemplating silently for a moment, as she savors another cookie or two. "Mmm... So... remember how I mentioned I found Strike Wolf, and I've been looking for his owner? Turns out... they found me."
Strike Wolf is still on her wrist, bright purple gem on a black leather bracelet, so there's clearly more to tell, but Kyouka seems to be organizing her thoughts.
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed.
Mai...might have worked at Dark Burger at some point? She could probably sort out the memories but really doesn't want to.
She also might have screwed up some cookies beyond salvation, so she laughs at the fate of those first chocolates.
But ultimately, Kyouka opts to talk, not to bury the subject, and Mai has to listen. She leaves the coffee alone, for now, because some things are important.
"You mentioned unauthorized use of a garbage can, yes." Sometimes Mai's tone turns sardonic, and sometimes she thinks the levity can help. Sometimes.
Her gaze goes to the bracelet. Frowns a moment - she isn't really that good at telling magical jewellery from mundane - but it looks familiar enough.
"...and Strike Wolf is still here." Even as she says it, she feels like something's not right - and stumbles forward. "So...what are you thinking? Take your time."
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Kyouka does ponder sometimes about picking up a job like some of her friends--it seems like a common enough experience here. Then again, she does do a lot to help take care of the house, so she feels okay about that, usually.
There is a bit of a grin at the mention of unauthorized garbage can use. "Yeah, that was the one."
And if there was any doubt, Mai's proclamation of 'Strike Wolf' is still here is met with an <Affirmative.> from the gem himself.
Kyouka sighs. "Soo... she showed up at my party the other night. Or, well, her assistant, I think? She tried to put everyone to sleep so she could take Strike Wolf. She disabled Strike Wolf, so he wasn't able to keep me from falling asleep. Thankfully, Cure Passion and La Sirene were on hand to stop her."
"Everyone's fine," she adds hastily. "Nobody got hurt. But the whole thing was... a bit tense. And a bit awkward."
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed.
Strike Wolf answers, and there's a faint smile from Mai at that.
It doesn't last long.
There's a growling somewhere in the back of Mai's mind and she's not sure if that's her Child or herself. The casual use of magic like that - specifically like that -
"Tense is definitely a word. I'm...not a big fan of magic that screws with your head, to put things likely." At least there were some people on hand, and maybe no one got hurt, but.
But.
"...so your friends told her off and she left. But...I'm hoping you at least got confirmation that this 'assistant' was legit? Not someone faking an interest to win your trust or anything like that. Those-" She cuts herself off, waving away the subject. "And - What now?"
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Kyouka doesn't have a Child, but she's had plenty of growlig in the back of her mind recently, too. And plenty of actual growling and scowling, too.
"I'm not a fan of the fact that she came to my house," Kyouka says darkly. "I've been trying so hard to keep all this from my Mom and..." She sighs helplessly. "Thankfully she dooesn't remember anything. Nor did any of the other guests."
"So... we're pretty sure she's legit. What she did was to use some... administrator access or something to revoke my credentials to use Strike Wolf. That's why he couldn't help me. Strike Wolf is pretty sure her access is legit though... He says it's really hard to fake that kind of thing."
"Anyway. He was trying to fix it while Passion and La Sirene were talking to her to figure out what she wanted. She claimed she was just trying to recover something that was stolen from her and her master. Not that it excuses what she did but... Once Strike Wolf fixed things and got me transformed, we were able to explain. I'm not sure if she believed us, but she asked for him back."
"I asked if we could have some time to talk it over, and she didn't seem too happy about it but she agreed. Said she'd be in touch and then just... teleported away."
"As for 'what now', well... Strike Wolf have been talking about that. A lot. We're gonna make the case for continuing to work together, but if his creator doesn't agree, then..."
She looks down at her lap as she lets that thought trail off, a deep frown creasing her brow.
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed.
"...then it should be up to Strike Wolf, right?"
Mai's voice is nowhere near certain, but her nails dig into her palm to a painful degree. She might be able to come up with some kind of side argument, but - that's not even the most important subject, is it?
"...you might have proof that at some point, this woman worked for Strike Wolf's creato. That still doesn't-" Mai cuts off her rant, opting for a little more gesticularing. Just - it's a bad start, right?
"...I'm disinclined to like her. Attitude aside, she started all this by going to your house - boundaries, much?" She's tense, and the other subject here raises its head once more. "...If not, it gets messy. But - you might be okay. Stalling for time, I mean. You've got time to think about where things are going, right? If you even..."
...and yet she can't bring herself to ask just one more question.
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Mai might have trouble expressing the words, but Kyouka just nods. There's a lot to take in, and she feels a bit the same way: So many things to be upset about, being unsure what to focus on first or how to process all the ramifications.
"Yeah, I know. I've been thinking the same thing--seems like the kind of thing that should be off limits."
"I'm not a big fan of her, either, but... Cure Passion says that she thought that this person could have used stronger magic or tried to actually hurt people but chose not to, so... I guess that's a point in her favor? Maybe? Kinda?"
"Yeah, we've got time. Don't know how much, though. She kinda didn't leave a calling card or anything. Strike Wolf and I want to keep working together, but if his creator doesn't agree, then..." She takes a deep breath to steel herself for the nxt part.
"He wants to go back. He... well, he wasn't finished being built yet when he was stolen. The assistant or whatever said he didn't even have a name yet when he was stolen. We both agree that he deserves to finish being built, to reach his full potential. Maybe eventually be able to do even more good for the world that way, you know?"
"Even if it's not--" she cuts that thought off. It's not one she likes, but one she has to be ready to accept.
'Even if it's not with me.'
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed.
There's defenses to be offered, for this mysterious mage's assistant - but some of them ring a little hollow, and there's a lingering anger that haunts Mai.
She tries to quell it. Coffee has many uses and it'd be nice if this one worked sometime.
And then there's that little bit of the bigger picture, and the words die in Mai's mouth. She swallows, starts to speak, hesitates.
Hesitates.
"...that's between you and him. You know what Strike Wolf wants more than anyone else in the world, right now. It's...kind of nice that you've got someone who can be that clear, it'd be a lot harder if he just beeped or something."
Mai waves off any comments from the device himself. "And that's a chat you two need to have without me around."
But. But. "...it's hard, though. You want to make a difference, you want to help, and the idea that the one you're trying to help might be okay without you..."
There's no heat to her words, no spontaneous flash of flame - just a teenage girl, glancing between tree trunks for something she knows full well she won't see. Ultimately, Mai just takes a swig from her coffee, because what else can she even do?
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Kyouka is only willing to even remotely consider those defenses because it was Cure Passion who brought them up. And even then...
"Yeah," agress Kyouka. "We've both been talking, and thinking, a lot recently. Looking at all the angles. The assistant said she couldn't take him by force so... I guess if we really wanted I could just... keep him, but... that'd make me no better than the mage I rescued him from."
She laughs a little, but it's that laugh of someone who can't quite figure out how to react to something, so their body just picks the first reaction that comes to mind. "I- Heh. I mean...It's... The day we met, I promised I would help get him back to his creator so... it's... I mean, this is what we wanted."
She pulls her legs up to fold them underneath her, and then leans forward, elbows braced against her knees. "This wasn't even supposed to be a thing, you know? Look around for his creator, find them, and return him. Took me... longer, than I would have liked, but... hey, mission accomplished, you know?"
"This was... this was always a temporary arrangement. So, no big, right?" She definitely sounds like she's trying to convince herself as much--or maybe more--than Mai.
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed.
To keep the Device would be the act of a villain. Mai can only nod at that logic.
And the laugh - oh, that bitter laugh. Hello, old friend, so terrible to hear you in the voice of another. Mai's grip tightens on her coffee, and she weighs her words carefully before speaking again.
"...this is what you promised. That's not the same as want." Her voice is quiet. Gentle. Firm. Because here and now, Mai can be the senpai in more ways than one, and her heart sinks at this truth.
"There's a difference. A big one. And that's the gulf that's staring at you. What it costs to keep your word - and you can't even think of breaking it, because that's not who you are." Quiet, still. Firm, knowing, and oh so bitter.
Mai's hand is on her coffee, the cup still set next to her, and the words on her tongue are far more bitter than the lingering taste of that brew.
"...I think you already know what you're going to do, Kyouka Okazaki. It's just - don't confuse keeping your word with personal desire. They don't always match, and that's the terrible thing."
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Kyouka is silent for a long, long time, considering Mai's words. She's right--what she promised, and what she wants are, indeed, two very different things, even if one of the things she wants is to keep her promise, and even if a part of her, even a large part of her, wants Strike Wolf to reach his full potential. There is, unfortunately, a rather large problem when it comes to what she wants.
"... I know..." she says finally, of that there's a difference between keeping a promise and one's personal desire. "The thing is..."
Her voice is fragile, almost weak, for a momet. "... I don't know what I want," she admits, quietly. "I want Strike Wolf to go back to his creator, I want to keep my word, but I also want to keep helping people, and I hate the thought of turning away from those in need, but I..."
A pause. And now her voice is a hoarse whisper. "I didn't ask for any of this. This is a lot to put on someone's shoulders."
She rubs at something near her eye with the back of her hand. Probably just an itch. Probably. "Then again, I guess there's magical girls out there who've got it worse than I do. So who am I to complain? I just... it feels like no matter what I choose there's some downside. At least, if I'm not able to convince this creator..."
<Pose Tracker> Mai Tokiha [Ohtori Academy (12)] has posed.
Going by grades or age alone, Mai is the senpai here. Going by experience in magical problems - probably the same. For this particular problem? Unfortunately, yes again.
Kyouka doesn't know what she wants. And didn't ask for any of this. And Mai lets go of her coffee cup entirely, leaving the indentation to figure itself out, and just slumps forwards to rest her elbows on her knees.
"It's unfair. I think there's moments of unfairness for everyone in this life - and some days, I think the worst off are the ones who did get a say in choosing it."
She's quiet a moment before she follows up. "...not that it's a competition."
The sigh Mai lets out carries the weight of years of worrying on its shoulders, and only then does she turn to look at Kyouka. "...I really am sorry. Because it's hard. Because what you want to do and who you want to be are at odds with each other, and there doesn't seem to be an answer that satisfies everything. You want to help people, Strike Wolf has helped you do that, and to help him you might have to give that life up."
Mai sighs again, and slowly stands up. "...it's not a contest," she repeats, "and you're allowed to complain. Because not knowing what you want...I think that's part of who we are."
"Not magical girls. Teenagers." Mai's sorrow finally shifts to a wry joyless smile, and that might not actually be better.
"I've had...a few years of that problem. And with the benefit of experience...I'm still trying to figure it out. Sorry."
Picking up her coffee, Mai Tokiha looks at Kyouka one more time. "...I really am sorry you're stuck with this situation. It feels like a platitude - but whatever you decide, you're going to have regrets, so just make the decision that feels right. And...good luck."
She never did grab a granola bar. But she did leave the cookies behind. They might not help, but they're something, and maybe that's the best she can do.
<Pose Tracker> Kyouka Okazaki [Juuban Public School (10)] has posed.
Kyouka doesn't really go for the whole 'senpai' thing. She understands it, of course, and knows what it /means/, but knowing what it means and growing up with it as part of your cultural framework are two entirely different things.
Still, she's glad for Mai's advice and sympathy, regardless.
"I think the only thing worse than getting a choice in this is just... having to wait to finally do it. Almost makes me wish I'd just... done it right away at the party, you know? Rip the band-aid off."
Kyouka signs and nods glumly. "I /do/ still want to help people. And... I mean, I can still help you guys out with... other stuff. Cover for you with school stuff, or... I dunno. Something. Even if it's not fighting I... can't turn my back on everyone, knowing what I know now."
There is a bit of a laugh as Mai clarifies that not knowing what we want is part of the teenager experience. There's a little bit of mirth to it: not much, but certainly more than the earlier one. "Yeah, uh... When I found out we were moving to Japan I told my parents I wanted a chance to have a typical teenager experience. Go to high school, all that. I, uh... sometimes I feel like I'm making up for lost time in the angst department."
She shakes her head a little. "No need to apologize. It... kinda helps knowing other people haven't figured this stuff out either." She lifts a hand to wave as Mai gets ready to set out. "Thanks for talking with me, Tohika-chan. I'll try to stop by Ohtori later with some chocolates for you and Mikoto."
She watches Mai leave, and then falls onto her back to stare up at the sky to keep pondering her thoughts.
